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Post by Caedes Oleander on Jun 7, 2023 13:34:14 GMT -5
She recognizes this monologue. It takes every ounce of her self-control and will-power to resist giving Zarius an incredulous look; instead, she maintains her poise, and continues to offer absolutely nothing to the conversation outwardly. Internally, however, she is absolutely stunned that Zarius dare bring this up now; and right to Lyari’s face! Right now! When they really need this deal? Or… maybe, just she, really needs this deal to work. She takes a slow, steady breath to maintain face; and her red eyes search the response of the elven woman. Lyari’s expression transitions from surprised to neutral. Her pale lips purse as she leans back into her seat, narrow arms crossing in tandem with the lift of one leg over her knee. “ Yes… I suppose if you put it into that perspective, I have plenty which would count as a loss.” She agrees, her voice monotone in its agreement. She doesn’t seem offended or particularly irate over his statement; but she does clam up about her men and does not further tread down that path. Perhaps, because she’s realized she’s been too open; and that she’s revealed a vein in which Zarius might realize she does have something to lose. “ That’s always how it starts, isn’t it?” Lyari’s murmur accents the fellblood’s starting sentence, but she allows him to continue without interruption. Her gaze is piercing, expression unfaltering while Zarius describes the fire, his mercenaries discovering her men, and the shop emptied of everything in it. “ Is that so?” When Zarius meets her gaze, Lyari tilts her head; her uncaring expression almost makes Mei nervous. It is, when Zarius mentions his reason at the docks, that something finally cracks in her expression. The insinuation that the merchants she had attempted to rob had bitten back, burning the shop of her liaison, and incapacitated her goons, seems to sit wrong with her. Her brows twitch, nails digging into the flesh of her upper arms. It’s a curious response; one that Mei is not sure she could take as a good, or bad sign. Her hand rests against her belt, regardless; posture subtle, but ready to leap into motion if it should turn out to be necessary. Lyari takes a deep breath, as if calming the demons that have risen in her chest, with Zarius’ explanation; her eyes tilt towards the side of her office. “ We’re all jackals; it’s just that some of us are better fed.” She breathes a heavy exhale as she leans forwards; she uncrosses her legs, and leans on her elbows. “ And that dwarf bastard was one of the most well-fed carcass scavengers I’ve ever laid eyes on; his loyalty wasn’t worth the counterfeit gold around his neck.” Zarius hits a particularly aggressive button in Lyari; one which seems more than happy to allow the blame to fall on the merchants, regardless of what information she might know which they do not. “All of Darkveil is better off without their business; we have enough knives already in our backs without our own suppliers running us in circles. Let them rot in their own egos, whatever you’ve done to the bastards.” She leans back in her chair again and pinches the bridge of her nose as if in exasperation. After a moment, she clears her throat and lowers her hands; there's something more relaxed about the way she crosses her arms again. "You've done us a favour with disposing of their business; but as you've mentioned, this will certainly lead to a vacuum within our suppliers. One that can easily be filled with... a more reliable sort."
She taps her fingers rhythmically against the curve of her arm; an awkward silence fills the office as Lyari's eyes linger on Zarius.
She turns her eyes away, thoughtful as she runs over all which Zarius has told her thus far. She curls her fingers beneath her chin as she looks back at Zarius; for a brief moment, she finally acknowledges Mei's existence; before looking back to him. "If you return my men to me in one piece; and do as you have promised me; I am open to further discussing my cooperation in your family's business in return."
Closing her arms again, she crosses one leg over the other. "However, I do not deal big budget items or bold heists for new clientele. You understand, of course; it's risky business."
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Post by Eameia (Zarius unavailable) on Jun 9, 2023 9:46:00 GMT -5
Zarius can almost feel the annoyance coming off of Mei as he corrects Lyari. The changeling probably was thinking all sorts of things, but this was a hill the fellblood would die on. It had a purpose, even if Mei couldn't understand why yet.
“I am not here to attempt to take advantage of you or your situation, Miss Uldreyn. I am earnest in wanting to come to an arrangement that is mutually beneficial.”
How much the woman would believe that was still yet to be seen. Lyari would not have gotten as far as she has in this business by being easily manipulated. But Zarius is a very good liar, he has to be given his position in Darkveil society. They're all products of a city the revolves around deceit, manipulation, and violence.
“Regrettably, yes.”
Much to his relief, it seems Lyari took the bait. It helped that the merchants were on bad terms with her to begin with, otherwise she may have not been so keen to believe the fellblood’s altered recollection of the events that transpired over the last few days. He watches her closely as she clearly runs through the information she has been presented through her mind.
Regardless of how she reacts, he tries not to get too comfortable. Things had been manageable up until this point, but if she had any reason to believe he was lying, no further explanation would do them any favors. They'd either be jumped on the spot, or Lyari would pry open any cracks in their story...which would probably lead to being jumped anyway.
“That sounds more than fair. We have little interest in keeping hard working folk from their jobs and families, even if their work is less than honest.”
Fewer bodies to dispose of as well. Last thing he needed was to potentially have Lyari investigate his claims or send someone after those currently missing, or have a worried family member take matters into their own hands. It was better for everyone if the men could just go on with their lives without thinking too hard about the situation they were unfortunately caught up in.
He waits for her to finish speaking before giving a nod in response. “Of course.” He rises to his feet. “I believe we have at least come to an understanding. I thank you for your time and consideration, Miss Uldreyn. We will not take up any more of your time.”
He looks down at Mei and waits for her to stand up as well. He wants to make sure they left together just in case any shenanigans are pulled when his back is turned.
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Post by Caedes Oleander on Jun 11, 2023 19:27:56 GMT -5
Lyari’s eyes follow Zarius’ motion to stand. She remains quiet, allowing him the courtesy of the floor while he agrees to her terms for the time being; it’s only when Zarius turns to Mei, and she stands to join him; that Lyari stands from behind her desk as well. The motion of the elven woman causes Mei to glance in her direction as she rises; but her motions are calm, and her hands are in full view of them both; held together against her lap. “ You are quite welcome, Rha’Oriyn.” Her voice remains monotone. “ Please have your men drop mine off at the docks which you visited this morning within a week's time; I will inform my handler to wait for you. Should they not arrive in full, we will have to... renegotiate, the details of this deal... but I trust that you are a man of your word.” There is nothing particularly trustful of her tone. Still, she looks between the two of them, her chest rising and falling with a sigh. “ Thank you for your time, effort, and understanding in regards to my men and my business. While this meeting was productive, I am sure there will be more to come.” Lyari’s boots click against her wooden floor as she circles around her desk; Mei paces closer to Zarius while she does. Her hand still rests skeptically on her knives beneath her cloak as Lyari reaches out, offering a hand to shake. “ Given you’re leaving alive, my men shouldn’t poise much of a problem for you on the way out… We will speak further when I have my men; but, should you find you need to call on me, you may do so by leaving a request with the dockmaster.” Should Zarius choose to, or to not, shake her hand; it makes no real difference. Lyari will eventually withdraw her hand back to her side; she turns her back on the duo. “I offer your parents my respectful regards as well; may this deal be beneficial for all parties involved.” She takes a few steps, as if to return to her desk; before she stops again, as though she has remembered something.
She looks to the badge still sitting on her desk, before turning to look at them again.
"And, if you don't mind." Her tone suggests that she would, in fact, mind. "I would like to keep this."
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Post by Eameia (Zarius unavailable) on Jun 11, 2023 21:29:15 GMT -5
"I will ensure they arrive safely," he affirms, confident that they can handle what is probably the simplest task out of this whole ordeal.
His eyes drift over to Mei as she steps a bit closer before Lyari extends her hand to him. Without hesitation, he takes a casual step towards Lyari, his shoulder brushing up intentionally against Mei's as he clasps the woman's hand and shakes it.
The end of his tail twitches a bit at the direct mention of his parents. It wasn't like his family was unknown, being one of the most affluent families in Darkveil, but this whole deal has put them in a more vulnerable position. They weren't faceless anymore, something Zarius' father had expressed time and time again his caution against drawing too much attention.
How much Lyari specifically knew was unclear, but he has no doubts she at least would suspect that Zarius' father could be a legitimate Ashen Father. Course there was a hierarchy to keep in mind, they were far from the top of this cannibalistic pyramid, which made being known even more risky given that assassins were a dime a dozen in Darkveil.
Zarius glances down at the badge then back at Lyari with a smile, he makes a sweeping gesture towards it. "It is all yours."
With their business concluded, Zarius departs from the shipyard with Mei close in tow. They stride out without deviating or pausing, wearing their welcome thin was not something the fellblood was interested in especially with all the suspicious eyes trailing after them as they leave.
After they are clear of the headquarters and well on their way back to the Rookery, Zarius sighs and rolls out his shoulders. That whole conversation had been incredibly tense and it didn't help that he was still tired from the past few nights.
It takes a moment for him to finally look at Mei. "I suppose that went as well as it possibly could. Now we just have to clean up the rest of this mess and make sure our tracks are covered up."
There were still things they needed to make sure were done carefully. He would relay the new developments to Eameia and his father. They would take all the steps to guarantee that Lyari's men made it to the docks safely. He would then need to get to work figuring out how to leverage this new opportunity without getting too ambitious too quickly.
The ultimate goal was to get closer to the Crimson Hand, but that was still a far too dangerous target to go after currently. They needed to build up trust with Lyari, expand their network, and stock up resources. It would take time. Time that felt so scarce these days.
He rubs the back of his neck. On top of all that...where Zarius and Caedes stood with one another was still in a hazy at best. Things were complicated, and that was putting it lightly. But nothing would be solved with silence.
Sighing, he clears his throat a bit. "Any thoughts?"
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Post by Caedes Oleander on Jun 20, 2023 19:00:08 GMT -5
Mei is never far behind on the way out; quick strides at Zarius’ heels keep her close to the fellblood; and those unwelcome, trailing eyes are met with cold, narrowed crimson. Their exit is quick, with no interruption from outside eyes despite their suspicious gaze; and in a matter of time, Zarius and Mei are back on the streets of Darkveil. Once they are well clear of the shipyard, she allows her shoulders to relax.
Mei closes her eyes, loosening her vice grip on her knife while she paces behind Zarius, boots crunching in the ash that’s since fallen. She hadn’t… quite realized just how tense she was until she allowed her stiff posture to fall; she can practically feel her racing thoughts start to unwind, leaving some room for just a pinch of silence at last. She exhales when she hears Zarius’ voice, turning her tired gaze to him, “ Mm.” She agrees; it’s weird, because she certainly thought she would feel better should the deal go off without a hitch. On one hand, she is relieved that it panned out to some degree, but… it doesn’t fix anything that’s already happened, does it? Sure, there’s a result; but at what cost? The silence is still heavy; and the atmosphere between them is still unclear. Mei rolls out her shoulders, easing back into reality and out of her own head. “ It’s a start,” she agrees, lowering her lashes as she trods behind him. When he asks for her thoughts, she can only assume he means with the business, “ I think it could still be saved. I've met her handler down at the docks while I was with her; I could run the men down when they’re ready, and make sure the hand-off is completed.” Afterwards, she falls silent; the only sound the crushing of ash beneath her boots before she hesitantly pipes up again, “ Or, whatever else you need me to cover up before we go about that.”
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Post by Eameia (Zarius unavailable) on Jun 21, 2023 19:07:39 GMT -5
He runs a hand through his hair. "I will have someone else handle it."
Zarius then pauses, realizing how his hasty answer likely comes off. "What I mean is, we both need a break. We can leave matters in my father's hands."
He tucks his hands into his pockets, feeling a bit awkward now.
"I, uhm, think it is important we keep our ultimate goal in mind. This...could potentially be a big step forward in finally being able to stand a chance against the Crimson Hand. But we still have a lot of work to do."
It really didn't need to be said. There was no way Caedes had forgotten about his revenge. It's the only reason he keeps hanging around after all. All this had been for that purpose at the end of the day. It was just a convenience that steps taking towards taking down the Crimson Hand coincided with Zarius' family's goal of climbing Darkveil's crime syndicate ladder. That's all there was to it.
Right?
He shakes the doubt from his mind. No. He wouldn't entertain any other motive.
"Come on, we should hurry back."
The pair return to the Rookery and Zarius steps up the stairs to the front door. Before he passes through the doors, he looks back at Mei.
"I will not make you face my sister if you do not want to. But I would not recommend hiding from her for long. If you were going to fear anyone's rage, it would be her's."
With that said, Zarius passes through the doorway, silently hoping that the assassin follows, but not surprised if she does not.
Eameia is there in the lounge, sitting at the bar with a book open on the countertop. She looks up from her reading as she hears the door hinges squeak under the weight of the doors. Seeing Zarius return is a relief, but there's still worry on her face. She closes the book and rests her arm over its cover. Her eyes do glance past him towards the front doors as if anticipating that someone else may be following in her brother's shadow.
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Post by Caedes Oleander on Jun 21, 2023 19:58:10 GMT -5
Zarius’ quick answer at redirecting responsibility to someone else catches Mei off guard; it shouldn’t but it does. She purses her lips, nose wrinkling slightly as she looks away from Zarius to hide the wince over his comment. Despite his following response, given the context of the night thus far, it’s hard to think that a break is the real reason Zarius doesn’t want her involved with it.
“... Mm, alright.” She simply agrees despite her feelings; she takes a breath as she brushes her hair out of her face and lifts her head, not furthering or pushing that topic while Zarius continues.
Right, their ultimate goal.
Mei crosses her arms loosely, fingertips barely clutching at her gloves as she walks beside him; she’s not forgotten about the Crimson Hand, nor has Zarius forgotten about his goals, she’s certain. That’s the only reason they’ve been working together; a stepping stone in the cruel ecosystem which is Darkveil’s ruling powers.
So what was with all of her concern in Zarius’ family’s business, which most definitely doesn’t actually involve her? Her reason for taking this solo was to ensure Zarius didn’t put himself, or his family, at the forefront of the Crimson Hand’s eyes on the off-chance she fucked up or anyone were to recognize who either of them were.
She pinches the bridge of her nose, swallowing the frustration at how far she’s fallen.
“Right.”
Mei hesitates at the bottom step when they do finally reach the Rookery; she looks past Zarius as he scales the stairs. She purses her lips when she realizes that lights are still on inside; and the idea of facing Zarius’ sister right now is incredibly…
Disheartening.
She refocuses when she hears Zarius’ voice. Mei remains at the bottom step even as he turns and passes through the doorway, her expression somewhat anxious, as she looks over her shoulder to the dark alley that she had used prior to escape without needing to face the young woman prior.
A few moments pass between Zarius’ entrance and any further movement from the door; but after some time, the door opens again. Caedes steps in after Zarius, ever his shadow despite the delay in his appearance. He feels his chest grow heavier when he, almost immediately, spots Eameia at the bar; but he can’t say he didn’t expect her to be waiting.
“Eameia,” he greets, finding that the silence of her gaze feels so much worse.
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Post by Eameia (Zarius unavailable) on Jun 21, 2023 20:17:19 GMT -5
Eameia's fingers curl around the end of the book under her arm as she stares Caedes down. She has half a mind to chuck it at him, but resists the urge to scold them both.
"Caedes. Good to see you." Her words are sharp and laced with other meaning.
Good to see you, after you disappeared for days without explanation.
Good to see you, now that you have stopped hiding in your room.
Good to see you, so I can give you a piece of my mind.
She only breaks eye contact to look at her brother. "You still look horrid. Go get some rest."
"Eameia-"
"Brother, so help me, I do not want to hear it."
Zarius sighs and glances at Caedes. He shrugs almost apologetically-- or maybe more accurately out of sympathy for the verbal lashing the changeling was likely going to get-- as he steps away and leaves the two alone in the lounge.
Eameia doesn't let Caedes out of her line of sight for a second, listening to the sound of her brother's footfalls go up the stairs and eventually disappear down the hall, most likely to his room.
The younger fellblood then gets up and crosses the floor to stand in front of Caedes, hands folded in front of her. She stares him down silently, clearly waiting for him to say something. Whether she wanted an apology, explanation, or something else was entirely up to Caedes' imagination.
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Post by Caedes Oleander on Jun 21, 2023 20:55:34 GMT -5
Oh, she’s really mad. It’s not a surprise, honestly; but it does take every ounce of his willpower not to flinch at the venom in her tone. He offers her a lopsided smile devoid of emotion, which softens as she regards Zarius. He shares a glance with the fellblood, and offers him a helpless shrug in return. As Zarius walks away, Caedes remains where he is; the changeling’s cloak hides the nervous fidget in his fingertips as the fellblood’s footsteps ascend the stairs, and fade until they’ve gone. All the while, he avoids Eameia’s eyes by gazing at a knot in the floorboards; only to look up when he hears the bar stool creak with her motion to stand. Heavy silence falls upon the lounge; and it goes unbroken by either fellblood or changeling.
For a moment, his pale gaze searches her uneasily while he waits for her to say something. Anything. … Similar to Zarius, he would rather she be openly mad; the silence falls heavier on him; and he can feel the guilt he’s been swallowing since his conversation with her brother creeping back.
He exhales shakily, anxiously turning his eyes to the nearest flickering lantern before looking back at Eameia and clearing his throat. “Look, Eameia… I fucked up; and I’m not going to pretend that ‘sorry’ is even close enough to excusing a single thing that’s happened. Especially not…” He fails on his words, stumbling a bit, before clearing his throat. “ … what I did to Eirynor.” Shame runs cold in him; the idea of facing Eameia or Eirynor about it, is… there’s nothing he can really do or say to fix it. He pauses, his voice apologetic despite when he continues. He meets her gaze. “ Regardless of the reasoning, or my mistake, you’ve every right to be mad. Whatever you’re going to say or do, you may as well go ahead. I’m not going to fight you on it."
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Post by Eameia (Zarius unavailable) on Jun 21, 2023 21:31:09 GMT -5
Mentioning Eirynor does get a reaction out of Eameia. She visibly tenses and digs her nails into her own hands for a few moments before relaxing her grip again.
She listens to him silently, her golden eyes burning in the dim light of the Rookery's lounge. When Caedes finishes, she remains still and silent for a few moments longer. It's hard to tell what exactly is going through her mind, then she takes a shaky breath.
"You are both idiots."
Her voice cracks, and the words hang in the air for a bit before she continues. Her voice quivers as she speaks and her normally composed façade starts to shatter before him. Tears well up in the corners of her eyes.
"I was so scared something horrible was happening. That one or both of you would not come back."
She struggles to keep the tears from rolling down her face and wipes her eyes with the side of her hand.
"You did not say where you were going, or what you were doing. I cannot do anything about things I do not know anything about."
Hiccupping, she covers her mouth with one hand and crosses the other one around her ribs.
"I do not want to think about what could have happened. I do not want to think about losing anyone. And I know our work is risky. I know it is dangerous and there is always a chance someone will not make it, but..."
She takes another trembling breath, anxiously chewing on the tip of her nail.
"My brother already shoulders too much for the sake of our family and our business. I worry he is doing the same for you...and that it may be too much for him to bear. I just do not know what more I can do on my own to help him."
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Post by Caedes Oleander on Jun 25, 2023 19:39:35 GMT -5
Of everything he might have expected to happen in the silence which follows, the tears that glisten in Eameia’s eyes is far from it. Caedes finds himself choking on his words; the crack of her voice somehow hurts far worse than any verbal or physical repercussions she could have put him through.
“Eameia…” he trails off, his neutral expression faltering almost instantly upon the unexpected change in her demeanor. Hesitantly, he reaches out as if to comfort her; but stops himself, pulling back slightly when she hiccups and covers her mouth.
He has no idea what to say; and for a moment, he only searches her helplessly.
It is dangerous.
There is always the chance someone will not make it.
These two things he knows, intimately. Eameia’s pain over the possibility of losing her brother hits a little too close to home. The changeling knits his brows and looks away; he purses his lips, burrowing his fingertips into the fabric of his cloak while he wrestles with his thoughts to find the words to say to her.
Anything.
“Shit… I’m… Eameia, I’m sorry.” He finally manages to choke out. “Look, I… I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”
He looks at her, uneasy and uncertain; there isn’t much he can say to make it better. To comfort her, and tell her everything will be fine, is a lie. Empty words in their line of work; still, it's tempting, if only to ease the trembling in her voice. He takes a hesitant breath before speaking, “Contrary to what it must look like, I care about your brother; and I care about you and your family. I’m not a stranger to the position I’ve put you all in with my being here. I… know.”
His motions are hesitant and a bit cautious; offering a hand on Eameia’s shoulder, he attempts to guide her to the nearest chair so she can take a seat; but he won’t push her if she shows no interest in complying. “I didn’t want you or Zarius involved if something were to go wrong, so I said nothing.” Should Eameia choose to take a seat, Caedes would sit across from her; otherwise, he crosses his arms and burrows his fingertips into the fabric of his arms.
“You do great work, and I’m sure your brother’s grateful for all of your assistances; this whole thing is my fault. I fucked up, and I burdened him with that mistake; and by association, everyone that I was trying to not trouble, and I... really am sorry.” He finds it hard to meet Eameia’s eyes, but he does his best to make a genuine apology; a course of action; just… something. He runs a hand through his hair, the next words harder to eek out, “I can try to explain what happened as much as I like, but it doesn't change anything; I never agreed to come here just to make his job harder. That was never the deal, and I’m willing to do what I can to make that right, if I can.”
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Post by Eameia (Zarius unavailable) on Jun 26, 2023 14:16:56 GMT -5
Eameia doesn't draw back or shove Caedes away when he puts a hand on her shoulder. He can feel her trembling under his touch as if doing all she could to prevent from breaking down...or blowing up, it was hard to tell. She was upset, that much was clear, but it wasn't just sadness, or anger, or frustration. It was all of those things all mixing together in a volatile cocktail.
She lets the changeling lead her back to the bar where they both sit down. As she sits on the bar stool, she knits her fingers into the fabric of her skirt.
"If something went wrong, we would have been left in the dark. If something had happened to you, we would not have just accepted not knowing."
Taking a shaky breath, she frees her skirt of her grip and tucks a loose strand of hair back behind her pointed ear.
"That is not how we work, Caedes. You are not expendable. Not to me, not to my brother. I think that much is obvious at this point."
It was frustrating to watch these two grown ass men beat around the bush around one another. To her at least, it seemed pretty clear that their relationship was about far more than just aligned interests. Even simply calling them friends seemed a bit reductive if she was to be frank with either of them. But she wouldn't say any of that to their faces. She knows how her brother feels and thinks when it comes to the topic of personal relationships, but she could not say the same for Caedes.
She assumes that Caedes is likely of the same mindset as her stubborn brother. Buisness first, even at the expense of friendships and personal life. Caedes was raised a killer after all. Their respective lines of work made it hard to trust people, let alone have romantic partners or any semblance of a normal life.
That was why this all was so frustrating. Here were two dumbasses sticking their necks out for the good of the family, Caedes because of some promise he made with her brother, and her brother because he has taken it upon himself to do all he can to give their parents, herself, and their younger brother a chance at normalcy. To live long enough to see retirement, to not have to run from the authorities for the rest of their lives, to not have to continue to constantly watching over ones' shoulder for enemies, to join the Mage's Guild, to settle down for a more simple life with a family...it was a lot of responsibility to shoulder.
And now...she wipes her eyes again and looks at Caedes. Now there was another. Another stupid dumbass taking on more than they should for their family's sake. Another idiot jerk who doesn't understand that they were never asked to push themselves so hard, and just how hard it is for others to watch as they take unnecessary risks.
"You did fuck up. Whether you realize it or not, you became part of our family and there is no running away from it now."
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Post by Caedes Oleander on Jun 28, 2023 16:08:27 GMT -5
Caedes opens his mouth to say something, but the words die on his tongue. For a brief moment, his braced expression falters into something more genuinely surprised. He feels his throat tighten when he swallows; his brows knit while he looks away; and it isn’t until he has refocused on Eameia that he feels, for the first time in a long time, a warmth at the corner of his eyes. His vision is blurry. Fuck. Gods damn it. He’s taken great care to swallow his feelings throughout this process; pushing down the anger, grief, and guilt that comes with an unfixable mistake as far down as it will go. In Zarius’ presence, he had almost crumbled a few times under the pressure of sheer guilt; the fellblood’s disappointment, uncertainty, and concern in lieu of anger shakes his confidence more than wrath ever could have. Only after their talk had he allowed himself the luxury of indulging in a pity party in the privacy of his room. But there’s a great deal of unaddressed feelings brewing beneath the surface too, waiting for the careful walls to collapse. The grief of a family taken in brutality; the survivor’s guilt as the last standing; the failures of the youngest child trying to act like an heir to his family’s name when he never was chosen to be; and the pressure of keeping a fiend from beyond this plane content for long enough to walk down a sloppy, brutal path that he calls revenge because he just needs closure and justification before he even begins to face the reality of his situation. The Rha’Oriyn family— Zarius and Eameia— were always meant to be stepping stones to find some kind of peace in the face of everything else; and she’s right, he fucked up. He let himself get attached to banter and bickering and familiarity: to golden eyes and lazy smiles and the sound of clinking bottles; to the ever-reliant presence of Eirynor and the bumbling presence of Snow. To Eameia, whose intelligence is as sharp and ever-present as her wits. Hell, even to the fucking monster that is Ebony, who finds her way into his room even when the damn door is closed, just to maul his ankles the second he walks in and then haul ass down the stairs. And Zarius, whose presence is confident; whose sly smile and mischievous laugh are far more dangerous in private conversation than when used as a facade to the public; and who is as merciful as he is merciless. If he naturally gravitated towards Zarius before when they met in the Marsh Flats, he’s the fellblood’s shadow by now; and he was more than willing to put himself at risk in light of their agreement— or, maybe more than just their agreement, in hindsight. The Rha’Oriyn family were important to him because they were important to Zarius; and they were important to him because sometimes it did feel like family. They weren’t his family, and they never would be: but the feeling was close enough that he would have to talk himself down, remind himself of where he was and what he was doing, to ensure he didn’t get too attached. … A lot of good that did in the end. After all that he’s choked down and pushed himself through to maintain face tonight… it’s pathetic, he thinks, that Eameia’s simple declaration above everything else that he might not be expendable— that he could even accidentally become a part of their family— almost breaks down every one of those carefully placed barriers in a single, fell fucking swoop. Caedes chokes on a laugh, but there’s no actual humor in the sound. “ Fucking hell, Eameia— after all I’ve put you through, you’re still going to hit me with that sappy shit?” His voice trembles despite his attempt to make light; and it’s actively a struggle to even look at her while he tries to keep it together, “ You make it sound like I'm about to attempt a jailbreak or something.” He snickers; but it’s pretty obvious by now that the laughter and smiles are masks.
Shit, this looks bad on him; and when he brushes the back of his hand beneath his eyes, its warm and wet.
He clears his throat and keeps his head tilted down just slightly, “I, um… look, I…” Caedes trails off, clearing his throat again before continuing, “I’ve been expendable before,” He takes a steady breath, “So if I missed all the signs, I’m… sorry; I don’t have to tell you that our business is complicated. I thought what I was doing was keeping you out of trouble; I never would have considered that I could be dragging you into it, instead, but clearly I was wrong.” The changeling crosses his arms over his stomach, never once finding himself able to meet Eameia’s eyes. “ I get it; I’ll be more mindful before I do some stupid shit next time, alright?”
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Post by Eameia (Zarius unavailable) on Jun 28, 2023 21:18:17 GMT -5
Eameia watches Caedes, his expressions, his hesitation. She watches as the slick, cool assassin she knows breaks down into, frankly, a scared child. It’s a stark contrast, but– given what she does know of Caedes’ past– it’s unsurprising. She’s tried to respect his boundaries, respect her brother’s wishes to keep her nose out of any of the changeling’s personal matters. But maybe that has done more harm than good for the man.
Caedes experienced her worst nightmare first hand. Everything she dreads happening to her family happened to Caedes and his loved ones. She cannot even fathom what that was like for him, especially in the aftermath. It must have been earth shattering, terrifying, and cripplingly lonely.
How long had he been on the run by himself since coming back to life? What were the conditions of his return from the land of the dead? She’s never asked, and she doubts her brother has either. Maybe they should’ve. Maybe they should have been more sympathetic.
It was risky to have friends in their line of work, to get personally close to anyone was a whole other matter. They had to keep their walls up to protect themselves from those who would take advantage of them or stab them in the back. She knows that.
She knows that.
But-
The sound of rustling fabric and the click of a few soft footfalls across the polished floor are all the warning Caedes gets before Eameia wraps her arms over his shoulders and gently pulls him into a hug against her.
If he wanted to pull away, she wouldn’t let him.
If he wanted to protest, she wouldn’t hear it.
She just holds him there against her.
Unlike her brother, there’s a soft, delicateness to her touch that almost teeters on the edge of fragility. Her embrace is warm, more so than one would expect from the average person, but it’s not unpleasant and more comforting than anything else. And, like her brother– though it’s masked under the pleasant scent of her perfume– there are those subtle whiffs of smoke that lift off her skin.
“Idiot,” her voice is quiet and filled with warmth rather than scorn. “You do not get it. You do not have to try so hard for our sakes. You do enough. You are enough. And you are not alone."
Her grip loosens and she pulls back from him. She moves her hands down and takes both of his in hers.
"You do not need to risk your second chance for us. It is your life and you owe us nothing."
She squeezes his hands a bit. "My brother is stubborn and will not say how he feels. He does not know how. Too many years wearing a mask for our family's sake. I do not want you to do the same."
A frustrated expression crosses her face. Try as she might, her brother held onto that ridiculous notion that as the first born son it was his duty and his alone to take on all the expectations and pressures of the family.
"There is only so much he will let me do for him. The least I can do is help, even indirectly, is to ease what burdens I can." Her gaze rises back to meet Caedes'. "If your burdens are so heavy, let me help you carry them. You do not have to bear them alone."
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Post by Caedes Oleander on Jun 29, 2023 20:04:55 GMT -5
Eameia’s soft footfalls, or the rustling fabric of her clothes, are simply not enough warning for the changeling in his state; his mind is busy— reeling— struggling to push back against an onslaught of feelings that he can’t afford to express in front of Eameia. Feelings he can’t afford to express in public— or at all, for that matter. He just doesn’t want to acknowledge the maelstrom lurking under the surface. His father wouldn’t cry, and neither would his brother; emotions don’t sit well in their line of work. He knows that too well. There’s no respect for an individual who can’t hold themselves together in the face of everything Darkveil could possibly throw at them; and yet, Eameia seems to have sabotage on her mind. Her presence hits him suddenly, shattering any semblance of composition he could scrap together in the moments of silence that followed his statement. He chokes on a sound that’s not a word; back and shoulders arching while he tries to pull away. “ No,” his voice falters, shuddering on the tears that flow, unbidden, down his cheeks. “ Eameia—” He pulls at her sleeves, hiccuping on a restrained sob. She doesn’t let him go. Something in him short circuits; memories of pulling away from the warmth of his sister’s hugs while they laughed at his childish, embarrassed exclamations of how he was too old for their bullshit reverberate through him. Memories of rushing over his mother’s well-wishes and attentions, or rolling his eyes while she stopped him at the door just to straighten the collar of his shirt and pull him into a hug before he left. … Why did he take those little things for granted? Because he felt like he had something to prove? He doesn’t realize that he’s given up and curled into Eameia’s embrace until he chokes on a sob into her shoulder; he knits his brows, hiding his face and curling his fingertips into the fabric behind her back. Contrary to Eameia’s warmth, Caedes is cold; even through the clothing he wears, the man has no body heat left to preserve— and it’s easy to feel that upon contact. “… I wish you would’ve just kicked my ass, instead.” His voice is muffled and weak against Eameia’s shoulder, but there’s no bite in them; the fellblood’s words seem to cause the changeling’s shoulders to quiver. As she pulls back and takes his hands, he is already exhausted; Caedes holds his head down, wet lashes half-laden while he avoids Eameia’s eyes.
It's been a long day.
“ I don’t need to,” he agrees, his shoulders drooping when he closes his eyes. “ But I chose to.” He exhales slowly, doing his gods damndest to straighten out; but he feels a lot colder than before, and the chill makes him feel all the worse. His brows furrow slightly when Eameia squeezes his hands. “I…” he trails off, drearily opening his eyes when he considers Zarius— the way his room had looked earlier— the uncharacteristic disorganization and mess. The alcohol. He doesn’t finish his sentence; but does finally look up at Eameia through white lashes when she speaks again. He seems to grimace slightly when she mentions he doesn't have to bear the burdens alone; and the changeling purses his lips, casting his eyes down again.
He wants to hide.
Run away and lock himself in his room until he can get it together.
Everything that he feels is so ugly and wretched, and it makes him feel vulnerable and small.
He sniffs quietly, brows knitting while he stares down at Eameia's hands; he should tell her no. He should tell her there's definitely no way he would let her do that, but as her words sink in and mingle with the lingering regrets of a man who's lost everything: what point is there to secrets? What has dishonesty and secrecy done, save cause him trouble in the long run? What has it done except make him wish he'd chosen differently?
Maybe it is time he stops trying to hide.
"... How?"
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