Roads to Hell [Hydra Aftermath][Private]
Jun 14, 2024 22:57:40 GMT -5
Post by Lady Astrid Stormstone on Jun 14, 2024 22:57:40 GMT -5
Hearing that Cyran took on a grievous wound to deal something of the same to Vulcadreaus and then needing to recover from it makes a lot of sense to Astrid. In the very same battle, she watched a particularly reckless samurai put himself in more danger in an attempt to do the same. In fact, everyone who fought Vulcadreaus that day put themselves in extra danger to deal with the beast from the volcano. She’s glad that everyone in the battle managed to survive, even if they left with more scars than they entered with.
While they all talk of similar experiences, Astrid lets herself lean into Del and Cyran. She hasn’t talked about the situation with Vikram a lot, mostly just to Leandros and Cantio – Leandros because he was there and through that situation the two of them formed a bond, and Cantio because, well, he’s her dad, and if she should be able to talk to anyone, it’s him. That may have been a struggle, to admit her hurt, but it was a good experience for them both that grew their bond to be even stronger than before.
She’s glad that Del and Cyran have been able to provide the same support. In fact, she’s grateful that she’s able to sympathize with Cyran in some effort to provide support to him. Zarius was his best friend, and while Astrid quite looked up to Vikram and admired his whimsy as a warrior, she still couldn’t imagine having to do the same to someone that she loves so much as a best friend or family. She couldn’t do it to Vikram; Leandros dealt the final blow. Could her hammer offer a close loved one the same mercy?
“I… don’t know how much Zarius knew about the thin’ he was strugglin’ with,” Astrid says quietly. “Maybe he did an’ just didn’t talk much about it ‘cause he didn’t tend ta lean on folks outside his family so much, at least from as far as I can tell…I’d seen it before, just once. We were on mission fer the Fighter’s Guild, an’ somethin’... Happened. Sounds like the same as what yer describin’... Where he weren’t himself. Blue flames an’ wings…” Her fingers fidget as she recalls the day, but also the seriousness on Anselm’s face regarding the topic of bringing Zarius back. “His da seems ta be keen that nothin’ will work ta bring him back… Whatever it was… It was scary in a different way than what Vikram was dealin’ with…”
At this point, Astrid has pulled the letter out. The envelope remains sealed. She’s only had the letter for a short time, just since visiting Anselm not long before. If Zarius wrote these, then he either knew what was going on or he just expected to come to an unexpected end with the dangerous work that adventuring brings. Holding this in her hands reminds Astrid that no day is promised to anyone. Does she herself have a contingency for death? Or does she just hope her plan to avoid it altogether works out?
“I… don’t know what Zarius had ta say ta me either…” Astrid admits, her fingers straightening a corner of the envelope absentmindedly. She could open it and read it now, but in all honesty, she’s afraid. She’s afraid that the thoughts in this letter are true and honest, that they might color her opinion of Zarius as a person differently. Zarius never really was upfront about his opinions on things…
But Zarius also helped Astrid stop being afraid of waiting around. He helped her get on her feet and take her first steps forward in her life, and through that, Astrid has found a better life with more people who love her than she ever imagined would be possible. Two of those people that she loves and trusts are sitting beside her now.
Tomorrow isn’t promised. It’s better to know than not. Don’t just wait.
Astrid carefully peels open the envelope and takes out the crinkled letter. With a deep breath, she starts reading it.
She pauses and glances over the top of the parchment to Cyran and Del. Well, they’re not Cantio or Wolfe, but…she trusts them, and she did promise Anselm she won’t tell anyone else about Zarius.
As her eyes trace down the page, Astrid feels tears burning behind them. At some points, she stifles a quiet laugh that might force the tears out. At others, she can just shake her head. When she reaches the end, though, Astrid can’t hold her tears back anymore. They flow down her cheeks without a care for what she wants them to do or not do. Her hands threaten to grip the parchment tight enough to puncture through it, but she releases the hold and sets it in her lap.
Zarius cared. He cared enough about her to give her some parting words to treasure. He was proud of her. He was as good a person as Astrid ever imagined him to be, even if he didn’t see himself as that.
Finally, a sob shakes her shoulders, and Astrid rubs her eyes in some feeble attempt to stop her crying. “W-Why couldn’t he just say all that when he was still here?” she chokes out, trying to make light of her grief. This alone makes her want to find a way to bring him back just to make him say it to her face.
Losing her strength to sit upright, Astrid plops against Del’s side and just lets her tears flow freely.
While they all talk of similar experiences, Astrid lets herself lean into Del and Cyran. She hasn’t talked about the situation with Vikram a lot, mostly just to Leandros and Cantio – Leandros because he was there and through that situation the two of them formed a bond, and Cantio because, well, he’s her dad, and if she should be able to talk to anyone, it’s him. That may have been a struggle, to admit her hurt, but it was a good experience for them both that grew their bond to be even stronger than before.
She’s glad that Del and Cyran have been able to provide the same support. In fact, she’s grateful that she’s able to sympathize with Cyran in some effort to provide support to him. Zarius was his best friend, and while Astrid quite looked up to Vikram and admired his whimsy as a warrior, she still couldn’t imagine having to do the same to someone that she loves so much as a best friend or family. She couldn’t do it to Vikram; Leandros dealt the final blow. Could her hammer offer a close loved one the same mercy?
“I… don’t know how much Zarius knew about the thin’ he was strugglin’ with,” Astrid says quietly. “Maybe he did an’ just didn’t talk much about it ‘cause he didn’t tend ta lean on folks outside his family so much, at least from as far as I can tell…I’d seen it before, just once. We were on mission fer the Fighter’s Guild, an’ somethin’... Happened. Sounds like the same as what yer describin’... Where he weren’t himself. Blue flames an’ wings…” Her fingers fidget as she recalls the day, but also the seriousness on Anselm’s face regarding the topic of bringing Zarius back. “His da seems ta be keen that nothin’ will work ta bring him back… Whatever it was… It was scary in a different way than what Vikram was dealin’ with…”
At this point, Astrid has pulled the letter out. The envelope remains sealed. She’s only had the letter for a short time, just since visiting Anselm not long before. If Zarius wrote these, then he either knew what was going on or he just expected to come to an unexpected end with the dangerous work that adventuring brings. Holding this in her hands reminds Astrid that no day is promised to anyone. Does she herself have a contingency for death? Or does she just hope her plan to avoid it altogether works out?
“I… don’t know what Zarius had ta say ta me either…” Astrid admits, her fingers straightening a corner of the envelope absentmindedly. She could open it and read it now, but in all honesty, she’s afraid. She’s afraid that the thoughts in this letter are true and honest, that they might color her opinion of Zarius as a person differently. Zarius never really was upfront about his opinions on things…
But Zarius also helped Astrid stop being afraid of waiting around. He helped her get on her feet and take her first steps forward in her life, and through that, Astrid has found a better life with more people who love her than she ever imagined would be possible. Two of those people that she loves and trusts are sitting beside her now.
Tomorrow isn’t promised. It’s better to know than not. Don’t just wait.
Astrid carefully peels open the envelope and takes out the crinkled letter. With a deep breath, she starts reading it.
Miss Astrid,
Before you read any further, please make sure you are somewhere you feel safe. Whether that is with your father or Mister Wolfe, I don’t mind you sharing the contents of this letter with either of them. I just want to be sure that you are around people you trust before you continue to read this letter.
Before you read any further, please make sure you are somewhere you feel safe. Whether that is with your father or Mister Wolfe, I don’t mind you sharing the contents of this letter with either of them. I just want to be sure that you are around people you trust before you continue to read this letter.
She pauses and glances over the top of the parchment to Cyran and Del. Well, they’re not Cantio or Wolfe, but…she trusts them, and she did promise Anselm she won’t tell anyone else about Zarius.
With that out of the way and trusting that you actually followed my instructions (seriously, do not read further if you are not with your father or Mister Wolfe), this letter is only supposed to be given to you if something dire has happened to myself. I felt it necessary to at least leave you with some words. I’m not sure if it will help with how you may be feeling, though I hope they do give some closure at least.
I often think about all those I have crossed paths with since setting out across Charon. Lately, I think a lot about how I have impacted the lives of others, and how others have done the same to impact mine. There are people I think of fondly, and those I detest. How fortunate for you to fall into the former category.
I tease. There is not a day that goes by that I regret our paths crossing. Though I suppose I do regret what happened when we fought those apes. That whole situation is a bit complicated. I still do not have all the answers for how it happened. I just hope that you’re not reading this because I failed to ever figure it out.
Anyway, I want you to know that– even though I wasn’t the one to take you in– I still feel a bit of pride when I hear of your achievements.
How far you've come since we met is honestly terrifying. To think about where you'll be in the next few years is near unfathomable. You very well may end up ruling all of Charon completely unintentionally at this rate. Though I know you do not seek prestige, wealth, or power. It’s nice to see how– despite all the world has thrown at you– you haven’t grown up too much. Stay a little brat for as long as you can.
Mister Wolfe confuses me, but you two make quite the dynamic duo. It is good you have someone so dependable at your side, and it is also good to hear of others you have adventured with. Growing up as you did, I can’t imagine how lonely it must have been. I hope you never experience that loneliness again and that you continue to be surrounded by people who care about you.
I feel that I must address some more unpleasant matters.
Your father and I didn’t meet under the greatest circumstances. Honestly, I went out of my way to bully him because he reminds me so much of my brother. They both have confidence issues but have talent they should be proud of. I hope one day your father will have the confidence to stop hiding behind a mask. I did consider writing him his own letter but I worried that he would faint out of fear that I wrote something scandalous about him. Gods. He just made it too easy to tease him.
It wasn’t deserved, which is more than I can say for your grandfather. He deserved every bit of it and I have no regrets. Still, I’m sorry if the tension between us idiotic grown adults caused you any grief. We should have handled our spats more maturely. Maybe there were even some apologies left unsaid that could have fixed things.
I’m grateful for the time we had together, and I have no doubts you will continue to do great things. Do be careful though, your father’s heart is a fragile thing and I’m certain he worries about you constantly. Also, do not let your grandmother get you into too much trouble. You know how she gets.
I’m sorry these are things you will only ever read in this letter. If things had been different, maybe I could have said them aloud instead. Sometimes life takes turns you aren’t ready for, even when you do your best to plan for everything. I guess this is my way of saying that you will probably face times in your life when you do not have the answers you need or want, and all you can do is live in the moment and accept things for how they are. It’s too easy to have regrets, or get obsessive over ‘what ifs’.
I am speaking from experience of course, but it has only been in the last year that I find myself having more regrets than I used to. I want to blame you and all the other good people I’ve met for that. I don’t think it’s a bad thing. I like to think that it may have made me a slightly better person.
I suppose that means I owe you my thanks.
Thank you.
Zarius
I often think about all those I have crossed paths with since setting out across Charon. Lately, I think a lot about how I have impacted the lives of others, and how others have done the same to impact mine. There are people I think of fondly, and those I detest. How fortunate for you to fall into the former category.
I tease. There is not a day that goes by that I regret our paths crossing. Though I suppose I do regret what happened when we fought those apes. That whole situation is a bit complicated. I still do not have all the answers for how it happened. I just hope that you’re not reading this because I failed to ever figure it out.
Anyway, I want you to know that– even though I wasn’t the one to take you in– I still feel a bit of pride when I hear of your achievements.
How far you've come since we met is honestly terrifying. To think about where you'll be in the next few years is near unfathomable. You very well may end up ruling all of Charon completely unintentionally at this rate. Though I know you do not seek prestige, wealth, or power. It’s nice to see how– despite all the world has thrown at you– you haven’t grown up too much. Stay a little brat for as long as you can.
Mister Wolfe confuses me, but you two make quite the dynamic duo. It is good you have someone so dependable at your side, and it is also good to hear of others you have adventured with. Growing up as you did, I can’t imagine how lonely it must have been. I hope you never experience that loneliness again and that you continue to be surrounded by people who care about you.
I feel that I must address some more unpleasant matters.
Your father and I didn’t meet under the greatest circumstances. Honestly, I went out of my way to bully him because he reminds me so much of my brother. They both have confidence issues but have talent they should be proud of. I hope one day your father will have the confidence to stop hiding behind a mask. I did consider writing him his own letter but I worried that he would faint out of fear that I wrote something scandalous about him. Gods. He just made it too easy to tease him.
It wasn’t deserved, which is more than I can say for your grandfather. He deserved every bit of it and I have no regrets. Still, I’m sorry if the tension between us idiotic grown adults caused you any grief. We should have handled our spats more maturely. Maybe there were even some apologies left unsaid that could have fixed things.
I’m grateful for the time we had together, and I have no doubts you will continue to do great things. Do be careful though, your father’s heart is a fragile thing and I’m certain he worries about you constantly. Also, do not let your grandmother get you into too much trouble. You know how she gets.
I’m sorry these are things you will only ever read in this letter. If things had been different, maybe I could have said them aloud instead. Sometimes life takes turns you aren’t ready for, even when you do your best to plan for everything. I guess this is my way of saying that you will probably face times in your life when you do not have the answers you need or want, and all you can do is live in the moment and accept things for how they are. It’s too easy to have regrets, or get obsessive over ‘what ifs’.
I am speaking from experience of course, but it has only been in the last year that I find myself having more regrets than I used to. I want to blame you and all the other good people I’ve met for that. I don’t think it’s a bad thing. I like to think that it may have made me a slightly better person.
I suppose that means I owe you my thanks.
Thank you.
Zarius
As her eyes trace down the page, Astrid feels tears burning behind them. At some points, she stifles a quiet laugh that might force the tears out. At others, she can just shake her head. When she reaches the end, though, Astrid can’t hold her tears back anymore. They flow down her cheeks without a care for what she wants them to do or not do. Her hands threaten to grip the parchment tight enough to puncture through it, but she releases the hold and sets it in her lap.
Zarius cared. He cared enough about her to give her some parting words to treasure. He was proud of her. He was as good a person as Astrid ever imagined him to be, even if he didn’t see himself as that.
Finally, a sob shakes her shoulders, and Astrid rubs her eyes in some feeble attempt to stop her crying. “W-Why couldn’t he just say all that when he was still here?” she chokes out, trying to make light of her grief. This alone makes her want to find a way to bring him back just to make him say it to her face.
Losing her strength to sit upright, Astrid plops against Del’s side and just lets her tears flow freely.